Thursday, September 13, 2018

Today, on Public Eavesdropping

So I'm stomping through the city, seriously considering pushing people in front of cars for the capital offense of existing in the same space as me.

Spent the last 56 minutes and 33 seconds comtplating stabbing myself with my pen as a preferable alternative to the conversation I found myself trapped in with a survey participant.

Thanks to frontier Fanny, who is single-handedly going to save the our country (and the world at large, provided she can fit it in before the evening barn raising) by restoring corporeal punishment in schools (and wherever else necessary), closing all small businesses (because young people today are too lazy to work anyway) (what???), and giving Black Lives Matter a "strong talking to." (This I strongly encouraged because I would kill to see that), I didn't have a shot in hell of making the last 20 bus leaving me no alternative to calling my mother for a ride (which is more complicated than it sounds).

As I'm barreling towards Times Square I slowly become aware of an argument between an out of town couple. And, by argument, I mean a girl yelling at her boyfriend while he seemed not to notice.

Apparently, they are on vacation from Rhode Island and he has been "treating her like shit" (direct quote) all day. As if she wasn't explaining the situation clearly enough, the boyfriend, who you'll remember, had basically been ignoring her, decides to demonstrate the behavior for which he's being chastised by asking her why she's whining. He then proceeds to vanish, he walked away from her in Times Sq and disappeared from sight. Gone. Fucking poof!

At this point, the girl is so upset she seems to freeze where she stood. Myself and two other women who have apparantly also been eavesdropping, surround her and start to comfort her, making sure she knows exactly what we think of her boyfriend. She needed to get to the 4 train to get back to her hotel so I told her to follow me. The other women gave her sage advice; go back to the hotel, pack up, and go home. Leave him here just like he left you. Only, we don't want him here either; hey asshole, wherever you are, hit the road jack, and don't you come back no more, no more....


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