Submitted for the Approval of the Midnight Society....

I call this story (insert throwing dust into fire here) the Legend of Beau Beau. Have you ever read The Monkey's Paw? It's a story about a man who comes across a decrepit Money's paw that grants wishes; only in order for the wishes to come true, something bad has to happen. Enter Beau Beau. After we lost Antigone my mom wasn't sure she wanted another cat. Unless it was a Bengal (Carbon is a black cat). Well, now we have a Bengal. Beau Beau (yes, his real name) has been showing up for about a year or so, but, last fall he showed up during a rain storm and stayed for three days. Camped out on our deck (hiding under it during rain) liked he owned the place. While he was out there I took a pic of his collar and originally thought he lived in Briarcliff Manor; a seven minute drive but a looong walk for a cat. Turns out, I misread his collar; Beau Beau lives at Briarcliff South, which is the complex across the street which might explain why he shows up so often. What it doesn't explain is why he's insane. Last Fall Beau Beau spent more time sleeping on our deck furniture than we did, scratched both my mom and I (to the point I bled through my pants), and wandered through our house after jumping through an open window! Several months (and a boarderline apocalyptic amount of snow) passed with niether hide nor hair of the orange Velociraptor but today, with the return of warmer weather... the Beau Beau came back the very next Spring, the Beau Beau came back the very next Spring, we thought he was a goner but the Beau Beau came back, the very next Spring...he just couldn't stay away! Have I mentioned Carbon HATES him?? Everytime he appears, it's like a night at the Colosseum; if the Gladiators were saved from actual battle by their mommy and grandma. Carbon puffs up, hisses and screeches like a banshee. "Get off my lawn" she bellows! As she should. I, too would like Beau Beau to stay off our property. But, since he refuses to do so, Carbie and I are on perpetual raptor watch. "They're too clever to ignore" said someone in Jurassic Park of raptors. The same is true of Beau Beau; ignoring him would be akin to pretending the water receding on a beach is curious, and not indicative of impending doom. So we don't ignore the CATastrophie that has bolted into our lives. We just accept that sometimes, the monsters turn out to be just trees; and sometimes they're an insane orange banshee that invades our personal space that shreds everything it touches, including (and especially) your sanity.

Faith, Trust, and Pixie Dust

Princess Mar-li was in a bad mood, a very bad mood. It had been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week. Every day this week the kids in her class at her new school (which, it should be noted is for children with special needs) seemed especially vexatious... Somewhere in the insanity I apparently thought I had the time and energy to buy lip gloss off of Facebook Marketplace (I did not). The game plan was to meet up with this woman near Emily's house (so we could go to Applebee's after!). However, Emily had to go into the office on the day we agreed on (she usually works from home), so I told the woman I'd resechedule. Instead, the woman offered to drop the lip gloss off at my house BEFORE I PAID FOR IT! She said I could simply Venmo her. This was perplexing, why would anyone take the risk of dropping off a product before it was paid for? Sure it was only $10 but still... I trepidatiously agreed, and forgot all about it. The day of the transaction was a banner day indeed; an absoulte nightmare from start to finish. The above description of the week could definitely describe Thursday...if you times each word by 1,000 so the last thing on my mind was some random woman with apparently more faith in humanity than common sense but when I arrived home that night, faith in humanity is exactly what was waiting. I almost missed it altogether; a small white gift bag with pink polk dots and a little bow. Inside, birthday cake, salted caramel, and vanilla (3 of each) lip gloss. She actually did it! Dropped off her product with no idea if she was going to see a dime (of course I Venmoed her right away). So shines a good deed in a weary world...